Tag: success

Re: Ambition

Folks who live to their nineties may have stood the test of time but if our only ambition is longevity then I’ve got to wonder about the meaning of life. Now I can say I’ve ever liked being tested, so maybe that’s why I have little ambition. Ambition enough to think on the word itself, I suppose, as long the thought is my own volition.

People enter competitions to win something. Our culture pushes us to strive, to seek new levels of expertise, or at least to earn a paycheque. Personal desire sometimes trumps the good of the collective, sometimes that individual drive can create new worlds for others who watch in awe. Those who compete at a global level in sport are in the news with the FIFA world Cup. I used to play soccer in grade school but would never have aspired to play football as it is practised by millions around the world. I have admiration and respect for those who follow a singular dream of winning medals, cups, trophies, or esteem. Fame and fortune can be the driver of ambition but I’m slightly afraid of those goals.

In my teaching career many principals and other educational executives flattered me with the proposition that I should move up the career ladder. I enjoyed the few accolades I got but I never felt I worked especially hard to get them. I felt like I was just being me, helping kids, wherever I could, to be confident in their abilities. I never enjoyed being a coach-like figure, preferring to be sort of a co-conspirator. I wanted my students to thirst for the wonder of life, not necessarily to strive for a societal expectation of achievement.

I entered contests for fun, not really to see if I could beat anyone but for the joy of group engagement. I write for the love of it, but have been hurt when I’ve been encouraged to send in a story or poem, only to be told I didn’t win. I lack the courage it takes to be ambitious. When it comes down to it, I don’t like the feeling that I’m being tested. After the test is handed in there is the inevitable grade. I worry how I will be judged. When I have put myself out there, on committees for example, I somehow mustered the personal will to make a difference due to my presence. I’ve been patted on the back, and also talked about behind that same back. It’s true that you can’t please everyone.

Desire is related to ambition. My desire to be a good husband and father has been with me for most of my life. I hope I’ve been judged well in that department. That desire probably came from wanting a satisfactory home life compared to the perils I navigated in my childhood. Trials are sent to test us. An ambitious person seeks them out. I would rather make my mind up when opportunity knocks.

If that makes me a scaredy cat then meow on me.

Re: Treasure

I think of the word Treasure in an emotional fashion like Adventure. I can imagine going on a voyage and discovering, at the end of my quest, a treasure most spectacular: That’s the little boy inside me, treasuring a moment of imagination. I want to believe anything is possible. And treats are like treasure. Like pirate’s booty, often buried for later.

Financially speaking, my parents were lower class. When holidays or birthdays came around there was always a feeling of stress in the house. Once my folks actually told us not to expect anything under the tree that Christmas. I learned to treasure what I had. Sometimes our parents surprised us with treats, gifted just because they had extra money that week. I remember treasuring a chemistry set presented this way, right out of the blue, like magic. Much later I remember a trip to Canadian Tire with my dad. I was looking for a single drill bit for a project I was working on. He bought me a deluxe set which I still treasure as much as any legacy he may have left.

I follow a fellow on Twitter who has made it his mission to reduce litter in his neighbourhood. He posts photos of the haul from the walk around his block. On one excursion he picked up a plastic lid that may be one of the first Tupperware toppers. Someone’s garbage is another man’s treasure is a phrase that comes to mind. He finds value in his personal project and the community sometimes joins him in this unselfish voluntary labour. My Nanna would have called  this good citizen, David Boudinot, a treasure.

Some people rise to the status of ‘National Treasure’: Sort of like a popularity contest yet hopefully due to merit. Cirque du Soleil once had that label in Canada. Other groups and people of note have been recognized as being treasured by their fellow citizens. Not to be confused with a National Treasury, which is a place where gold used to be stored as a country’s monetary standard. The success of a country was often measured by wealth of this nature. I often wonder if some countries with fewer ‘material things’ feel impoverished. Or do they have another measure of treasures that would teach me something I don’t know about value.

As a retired person with a successful career behind me, I am treasuring the fruits of my labour. Financially I’ve been luckier than my parents. My eldest son and I got into a deep dialogue around the topic of success and how it is measured. I still treasure the moments I had with him as father to son and now I place great value on our adult friendship. His generation has not had the easiest road to career style employment as my generation. In my eyes he has succeeded, regardless, in finding treasures along the way.

When I downsized I gave away many things I once thought were treasures. Now I look to time as a treasured gift to spend freely.