There was another shooting headline from gunplay in the USA. Also in my newspaper that day were stories of wildfires causing POTUS47 to complain of air quality. Both stories got me thinking of how people process what to do next, after bad things happen. Some folk search for an immediate cause, so that they can put disturbing notions in a box to be filed away. It’s always easier to blame someone or something than get to the real reason for the event that just happened.
When my father-in-law was approaching death, my wife and I tried to figure out how we could help each other through this pivotal moment. An apartment in the same building as her parents was rented so we could just be an elevator ride away. This was one of several details to work out over a two year span of time. It was complicated, messy, and draining on our emotional health. Blaming someone for dying borders on stupidity, yet my father-in-law was the reason we were gathered. I remember assuring my wife at one stressful moment that I was present for her, not for her father: I was present because of the man I called Will.
Finding a cause of something can be as difficult as determining a motive. The difference between reason and cause is not only a question of semantics but one of approach. Will had not earned my desire to be helpful in his palliative care, yet the fact of his lack of planning for his death at 93 was one of the reasons for my wife (his only child) to be in such a dilemma. As support structures were slowly put in place for Will’s care the burden on his daughter became less onerous. Others looking in on the situation showed varying degrees of sympathy. They might see a solution to the crisis by identifying the cause without measuring the impact of potentially creating further problems. Deciding what paths to take that are reasonable requires a deep dive into the needs and wants of many, not just the few. Ultimately priorities will be set.
Tumbler Ridge, British Columbia went through a heart wrenching experience recently, proving that death by gunfire is a global tragedy. Many politicians scurried around giving solace while trying to pin the blame on the various sources. The need to know what went wrong, had to be tempered with the needs of the survivors, responders, witnesses, and citizens. Responsible folk had to step up, regardless of how they felt about the multiple players in this real-life drama. Supporting the grief had to come first while everyone gathered because of something that repulsed their idea of a safe society.
Those wildfires seem to be beyond reason, yet suggesting that a boreal forest floor needs to be swept regularly is blatantly unreasonable. We can be blinded by rage, or even discomfort, when asked to help in taking steps toward finding a solution to a problem. In this case the why of a heating planet is not as important as finding a way to save humanity.
